Updated: Sep 7
As a working mother, how much time do you have for yourself per day?
Are you feeling you are having time for everyone and everything but not for yourself?
Do you wish you could move forward with your life without feeling guilty towards your family?
Are you starting to have your own things in mind or you want to go back to work, but just feeling about it makes you feel guilty?
I was there. I feel you. Three kids, family moves abroad following someone else career, organising life for everyone and then I felt left with no energy for pursuing my dreams or even little me-moments. The more I was trying to listen to my needs, the more I felt the impossibility to make them real.
If you are used to and trained yourself to never listen to your own needs and always give others priority, of course it feels like something very rare to do.
The hectic lifestyles of mothers emerged in a British study. Statistically mothers get maximum 17 min Me-time per day, where they actually not engage in household, work or family logistics.
So how would you manage to cut out time for yourself if the day has only 24 hours and they are already taken by plans, work, family management and logistics?
For my feeling it started with growing my mindset from what I thought I should do, towards what is needed to do. In simple words: prioritizing. But also, setting limits to myself and recognizing my internal motivation to do everything perfect as a limiting belief.
Limiting beliefs are forming our actions motivated through stress, fear of failing. The wish of being enough for everyone can lead to limiting yourself, as you don´t take enough of space&time for yourself.
Here is one simple thing you can do to carve out time for yourself:
· Count the many little things you are doing for your family per day. Try to distinguish between things you need to do (bring kids to school e.g.) and you feel you should do (do you really have to do the cucumber stars for the lunchbox? e.g).
· Try to leave out the things you should do, count them, and take that time instead for yourself: read a book, take a bath, make a walk, have a coffee or a phone-call with a friend.
This is how you can start to choose to give yourself a little priority every day, between all the needs of a family by taking away the “should”. Yes, it sounds easy and not “such a big thing”, right? So, try it out!
Would you like to be supported by recognising your “should do-s” and limiting beliefs which hold your motivation back to give yourself priority? Let´s have a chat.